I take it all back

Remember a few entries ago when I complained about my roommate's inabililty to load a dishwasher properly? And it defied common sense? I have the bestest roommate ever! And I take it all back! (And we know I don't use the exclamation points lightly)

Last night my world got turned upside down. It's amazing how the world keeps going topsy turvy and changing isn't it?

Self: Yes it is.
Me: I wish it would stop for one second.
Self: I know. Remember what Buddha says.
Me: Whatever

I'm a little grumpy right now. I'll be more philosophical about it later. See last night my roommate R. informed me that due to a family situation she's going to move out in August. Here I was all happy with my living situaton, telling people it was perfect aside from some dishwasher issues, and now it's all going to be gone in a month.

Normally I take change in stride. No, really I do. (oh shut up, I do) But, this year has seen a lot of disruption. February we had a death in the family when R. cat died. Dante and I were very close. That same week my new laptop had to go in for repair, and there was something else bad but I can't remember what.

Okay, you have to laugh at that. There was this terrible week in February and three really awful things happened. But, I can only remember two. It's true what they say. You do forget pain.

But, now this. My roommate is abadoning me and my living situation -- whether I keep the apartment and find a new roommate or get a place of my own-- is all going topsy turvy on me. And it's happening at a horrible time as work is picking up and frankly I don't want to spend my little free time finding roommmates or apartments.

My friend J. said don't worry about it. I'll get through it. I know.

But, this just really sucks.

So, I take it all back. R. you're the best and I don't want you to go anywhere. Until I'm ready to go anywhere, too. Can't we work that out? Uh?

Self: Do I really have to say something?
Me: No. I know. Buddha. Change. Impermanence. No grasping. Got it.