Me and drunk - old friends

"The world's first Pina Colada was supposedly invented in the Hotel Caribe Hilton in Puerto Rico in the 1950s."

I love this fact because it combines two of my favorite things: stupid trivia and booze.

I don't want to give the impression that I'm a lush. I'm not. I just come from a long line of them and so yes I enjoy the occasional alcoholic beverage. and yes one glass a wine a night is occasional especially in light of my more lush-full past. Oh there was lushiness all around when I was younger.

But, I try to keep it in check now. Because me and drunk we had a sordid past together.

The first time I seriously consumed large amounts of alcohol was my last semester senior year of college. Yes, I was a little late to the lush games. It was the one area of my life I seemed to be a late bloomer. What can I say. I was living in the dorms and had made some new friends. We had a hard week and decided to cap it off with a night of drinking and fondu.

This required to illegal acts on our part: underage drinking and an open flame in the dorm room.

The fondu did not turn out so well. The drinks flowed freely though. We had a lot of fun. But, around midnight when I was suddenly in my new friend's Mary bedroom things took an ugly turn. I known this girl for about two hours and we hit it off right away. Felt like we known each other for ever. So, I felt very comfortable to empty the content of my stomach all over her bathroom. It was a lovely introduction.

My less drunk friends had the pleasure of cleaning up after me and then putting me to bed while I lush-fully mumbled apologies, asked to die, and swore to never drink that much again. Not never drink again, just not that much.

My very good, less drunk friends also left me a glass of water outside my locked door so I wouldn't dry heave. Lush logic is a beautiful thing.

Fast forward through my studio guide days where there were a couple more meetings with me and drunk. But, that requires a much longer post and I don't want to bore you to death. So, let's just skip to the 25th birthday, where me and drunk's relationship really changed.

Ah, 25th birthday I decided I wanted to go to a karoake bar because there's nothing more fun than drinking and singing badly. I made two huge mistakes that night. One, I didn't eat a full meal. In fact, before going to the bar the only thing I ate for dinner was a Luna bar. Two, I let everyone buy me a drink of their choosing.

By the end of the night I'd had a beer, a glass of wine, a black russian, a sex on the beach, lemon drop, some chocolaty shot thing, whiskey sour (our waitress got me that and started me on a long path of ordering whiskey sours) and who knows what else. That's all I can remember. So, me and drunk had a joyful reunion.

It was a very fun night. Lots of singing. Lots of dancing. Lots of photos of me with mouth opened up wide as possible as I laughed. And I really held it together until most everyone was gone. My less drunk studio-guide friends who were taking me home were collecting my things and I was not feeling so good.

But, I knew all I needed to feel better was a breath of fresh, cold LA air. Soon as that air hit me I felt better especially when I threw up. Thankfully, E. a true gentleman, stood over me holding my hair back and wiping vomit off of my green doc martins. E. and I have not spoken in a long time for reasons I won't get into, but nothing bonds two people like vomit. I shall forever be grateful to him.

My friends took me home and much drunken mumbling of apologies, pleas for death, and promises to never drink that much again followed.

But, to me the funniest moment was when I got back to my former friend, queen of the damned, apartment. I immediatly laid down on the couch where I would not move from for the rest of the night. Concerned that the only thing on my stomach was a luna bar and whatever alcohol did not end up on the sidewalk in front of the bar, queen of the damned (QOTD) decided I needed a cracker. She stuffed a saltine in my mouth.

I clearly remember thinking I don't have the energy to chew. So, I'm drunk, nearly passed out, with a dissolving saltine in my mouth. Not a pretty picture. Somewhere deep inside me I gathered the strength to swollow that saltine down.

It's amazing what people are capable of in times like these, isn't it.

QOTD also left me a glass of water by the couch. It was still there the next morning.

So, after that I really had to sit down and have a talk with drunk. I explained that yes, we had many good times together. I would treasure them always. But, between the vomit and the saltine and the pleas for death maybe the bad outweighted the good.


Does drunk come knocking on my door sometimes? Sure. Do I open the door and peak out to see how she is? You betcha. But, the visits don't last long. I cut her off. And I think we're both better off that way.

So, now I only drink occasionally. A glass a wine at night. Maybe a martini with co-workers. On occasion a happy buzz, one drink short of drunk, one more drink than "I'm good to drive". It's all about moderation. And avoiding mumbling, drunken pleas for death.

So, raise a glass and cheers,
v.carrie

Joey Potter and weird things you see in life

You'll have to excuse me. I just drank 6 fluid oz of sake. Sake can really hit you hard. But on with the show.

Hey have you missed me? Have y'all been wondering where did v.carrie go and all the laughs? Did you start having visions that I was stuck under the refrigerator with no phone in reach? Don't worry I'm alive. I'm well (physcially at least. mentally...well)

So, Thursday I went to stitch n' bitch (SNB).

[ If you'd like to read about my knitting check out "the other blog I ignore" Block This! Linked to the side]

Afterwards, Gwenny, my faithful partner in knitting, and I went to Barnes and Noble. She started talking about her boyfriend. And it brought back memories of Dawson Creek. See Gwen's boyfriend is her Pacey and it's actually kind of scary how closely her story parallel's a WB show. And it's really cute and I was there to see it happen and that makes me a little warm and fuzzy. And the thing is, I want to be Joey Potter. Dont' we all? It's the only Dawson's Creek character worth being if you're a woman because well the other female characters end up crazy, addicted and dead.

Jen - recovering slut. Dies
Abbey - redeemed bitch dead
Joey's roommate who's name I forgot - drug addiction. Not in the series finale. So, dead. Audrey was her name.
Andy - crazy. disappeared to Italy. So, you know, might as well be dead.

So, I want to be Joey. Because Joey wasn't dead. And she ended up in France and then ended up with Pacey which all true fans of Dawson Creek wanted to see. And meeting one's Pacey can't be bad. Because Joshua Jackson, so cute. Love him. yes I'm a little scared I'm drawing parallels to my life and a WB show.

Wow, the sake is really hiting hard at the moment.

So, the other thing on my mind is how there are some pretty weird things you see in life. And I think LA makes the chance of seeing weird things that much greater.

1) At the gym saw an african american gentleman walk through with white all over his face. Make of that what you will.
2) One day, at lunch at Rubio's in Marina Del Rey , saw a woman walk through a parking lot in her bra and panties while holding her nicely folded clothes in hand.
3) At Trader Joe's in Studio City saw a man I can only assume was visiting from Africa walking barefoot. He had the lip plate in his lip. National Geographic was walking through Trader Joe's. It was pretty cool.
4) Porno Queen seeking signatures for her run for Governor of the state during the recall.

And yes, these incidents make me think it's pretty neat to live in a city where these things happen.

Okay, enough of my sake induced rambling.

Cheers,
v.carrie

Yarn update

I know you're all waiting to find out about my yarn for "tie one on" Update is still waiting to hear from Southwest Trading Co., but they are looking.

In the meantime working on my first hat.

v.carrie

PS: File this under the most boring entry ever.

Ahhhh!

Yeah, that sums it up. Last night, Sunday, I was sitting knitting and all of a sudden it hit me: I have to work tomorrow. The weekend goes by way too quickly.

I had a lovely weekend. Saturday so much fun at Laurie's birthday party. Don't believe her when she says she was a bad hostess. She throws a great bbq. I loved meeting more of her friends.

But, then Monday comes. See Saturday I went to Gap before the party. I was so excited to buy a pair of pants that fit. Today I had to put a new blue ink cartridge in my printer. Can you see where this story is going? Oh yeah. I open the little plastic part and blue ink comes dripping out right onto my pants!

Ruined! My new pants are ruined! I'm so bummed about it. I loved those pants. I'm sitting here thinking of ways I can cover up the huge honking blue ink stains on them. Maybe I'll sew some patches onto them. Maybe I'll paint over the stains. Maybe I'll embroider over the stains. Maybe I'll buy another pair of the same pants.

But, for right now. I'm mouring my pants. At least I got one day with them in good condition at Laurie's party. You know during happier times.

Where have all my ideas gone?

Alright, have been writing as often. Partially because I'm busy with that place I cannot discuss. Partially because I keep forgetting what I want blog about.

Last night leaving SNB (stitch n' bitch) I something in mind to talk about, something to share. Now, completely gone. My memory is getting worst and worst. My brain a seive of ideas. Only not catching the good ones. So, a few random undeveloped random thoughts:

1) The two best times of day during the work week are first thing in the morning and last minute before leaving. First thing in the mornign the day is still full of wonderful potential and everything hasn't hit the proverbial fan yet. I love that moment.

And if you're like me in the morning, you don't really do that much work. No, you get a cup of coffee or tea. Scan through the email. Scan through the news. Do some blogstalking (thank you Laurie for the terminology) And just relax. Calm before the storm.

And of course last minute before you leave is obvious. You're leaving!

2) Wine is good. I originally typed that as wine is god. And that's true, too.

3) My cats are cute. But, I don't have time right now to post new pics. But, feel free to check earlier posting where I was much more creative and humorous.

4) Other drivers suck!

5) Hey, I just rememember something I was going to write about. Traffic. I know, not original but this is somewhat about LA. And LA and traffic go together like black and blue or hangover and headache or some other pain in the ass pairing.

However, driving yesterday and I was on the 10. It got me thinking about how one speaks about traffic in LA. And no I'm not talking about cursing. Rather, in los angeles if you were to ask me how far it is from studio studio to the beach my responce would be:

Me: Depending on traffic 30 minutes to 2 hours.

Notice how I responded, not with a measurement of distance, but a measurement of time. Believe it or not in other cities people actually respond with distances. But, in LA it's not about how far something is, it's all about how long it takes to get there.

People who live on the West Side get this horrified look when you suggest they might actually have to drive out to The Valley. Mind you The Valley is only 12 miles away. But, that 12 miles depending on traffic can take a long time to traverse.

So, that's my observation for today. It's not about how far away something is. It's about how much time it takes to get there. And is that time better spent elsewhere?

Me: I'm so wise.
Self: *rolls eyes*

cheers,
v.carrie

I take it all back

Remember a few entries ago when I complained about my roommate's inabililty to load a dishwasher properly? And it defied common sense? I have the bestest roommate ever! And I take it all back! (And we know I don't use the exclamation points lightly)

Last night my world got turned upside down. It's amazing how the world keeps going topsy turvy and changing isn't it?

Self: Yes it is.
Me: I wish it would stop for one second.
Self: I know. Remember what Buddha says.
Me: Whatever

I'm a little grumpy right now. I'll be more philosophical about it later. See last night my roommate R. informed me that due to a family situation she's going to move out in August. Here I was all happy with my living situaton, telling people it was perfect aside from some dishwasher issues, and now it's all going to be gone in a month.

Normally I take change in stride. No, really I do. (oh shut up, I do) But, this year has seen a lot of disruption. February we had a death in the family when R. cat died. Dante and I were very close. That same week my new laptop had to go in for repair, and there was something else bad but I can't remember what.

Okay, you have to laugh at that. There was this terrible week in February and three really awful things happened. But, I can only remember two. It's true what they say. You do forget pain.

But, now this. My roommate is abadoning me and my living situation -- whether I keep the apartment and find a new roommate or get a place of my own-- is all going topsy turvy on me. And it's happening at a horrible time as work is picking up and frankly I don't want to spend my little free time finding roommmates or apartments.

My friend J. said don't worry about it. I'll get through it. I know.

But, this just really sucks.

So, I take it all back. R. you're the best and I don't want you to go anywhere. Until I'm ready to go anywhere, too. Can't we work that out? Uh?

Self: Do I really have to say something?
Me: No. I know. Buddha. Change. Impermanence. No grasping. Got it.

10% off - what a bargain

Who doesn't love a discount? You go into a store and you see 10% off and you're so much more willing to buy it because it's a bargain.

Well folks, I'm 10% off so I'm starting to feel like a real bargain. Not in a cheap way of course. More like deal of the century way.

A couple years ago I put on some extra weight and all the body image issues came out in a big way. I've always had weight issues real and imagined, and I really was starting to think that was it. I'm just going to be heavy for the rest of my life.

Then I woke up and realized I'm not! I'm not destined to be pleasantly plump. So, I joined weight watchers 10 weeks ago. At my last weight in I reached my 10% weight loss goal! I'm 10% off. There's 10% less of me.

And I feel great. It feels wonderful to let go of something, anything, that you just don't need in your life anymore. To let go.

So, after that news I decided there were other areas of my life where I could lose 10%. Because really 10% isn't that much.

I've started with my room. This weekend I went through the closet and under the bed and around the computer and just got rid of what I didn't need or want. Sunday gave away a bunch of stuff to Goodwill.

And you know what? I have more room for all the things I do want and need. I have room in my closet for the new clothes I'm going to need because all of my pants are almost falling off. I have more room for the important momentos from my life that I like to look at and touch and remember. And room for a new wardrobe. That's right the Swedish siren song of Ikea is calling to me.

Next: 10% less stuff laying around in my car for no other reason than I've been to lazy to throw it out.

So maybe I overreacted a little

Macworld: News: WWDC: Apple drops IBM PowerPC line for Intel chips: "Third party developers, including Microsoft, announced support of the transition following Jobs’ announcement.


“We plan to create future versions of Microsoft Office for the Mac that support both PowerPC and Intel processors,” said Roz Ho, general manager of Microsoft’s Macintosh Business Unit.


“We think this is a really smart move on Apple’s part and plan to create future versions of our Creative Suite for Macintosh that support both PowerPC and Intel processors,” said Bruce Chizen, CEO of Adobe."

With my worry that my laptop would be completely useless in a year, maybe I over reacted. A little. Perhaps.

Sorry I gave the middle finger to change.

My entire world has changed

Apple announces shift to Intel chips from IBM - Yahoo! News: "SAN FRANCISCO (Reuters) - Apple Computer Inc. (Nasdaq:AAPL - news) on Monday said it will shift to using Intel Corp. (Nasdaq:INTC - news) microprocessors in its Macintosh computers, severing its long relationship with International Business Machines Corp., which had supplied chips to Apple."

Buddha teaches us that life is change. And it is with this in mind that I'm trying to push away my feelings of trepidation and betrayel at the news that Apple is going to intel.

No that isn't me you hear going AHHHHHH!!!!!

Mr Jobs has done a good job steering the Apple ship all these years and generally I trust his judgement. However, after sinking a good chunk of change into a 17 inch G4 laptop, which I love, back in December -- not even a year ago-- I can't help but feel that in the next two years I will never be able to buy another application for it again. I'm kind of pissed about that.

Maybe I'm wrong. Maybe I'll be able to chug along just fine with my laptop for another few years like I hoped. Maybe the world isn't coming to an end. Maybe this will only make the Mac platform stronger and betterer than ever. Maybe.

But, I remember what Buddha says Life is Change. And I ignore the part of my mind saying fuck change.

I'm not crazy!

You know how sometimes you keep things to yourself because you think you're the only one who thinks and/or feels that way.

Self: Yes, I do.
Me: I'm so glad. Because I think I might be the only one who knows what I mean.
Self: I should try an example.

At work there's a kitchenette. In the kitchenette there are cups. What I deem the normal size cups (probably 16oz? And only in America is that normal) These paper cups are the perfect size for tea and water and if I drank the coffee in the office, but I don't because the building seems to reject good coffee...coffee. And everyone has been happy about this.

But lately whoever is in charge of keepings cups in stock have been buying these extraordinarily large cups. 20 oz. It's the worst size cup. I'm making tea and it's like don't fill it up because then it's too much water, and I can't seem to judge the proper amount of hot boiling water to steep my tea bag in. It's been really annoying. It almost makes me give up on tea for the day.

However, I then get a little rational and calm down and just deal. And I don't want to complain because it seems like a silly thing to complain about. And I'm probably just crazy. (And I'm really glad that in the update of the Chicago Style Guide it became okay to begin a sentence with And)

So, I was so happy when my co-worker J. came in and said "what's with these big cups. I can't figure out how much water to use for my tea. I hate these." I leaped in joy and happiness beause (figuratively speaking) I'M NOT CRAZY. I have company in my extraordinarily large cup dislike...nee hatred.

But I'm a little worried about my partner in crime. J. just told me "don't worry. be happy" Maybe I should be more worried about my sanity after all.

So, revision: I'M NOT CRAZY ... at least not the only crazy one.

Talking to myself

Me: I want to blog.
Self: Okay. But, what do I want to blog about?
Me: I don't know. I had this one really interesting thought yesterday.
Self: It wasn't that interesting.
Me: I guess not. I did forget what it was about.
Self: Talk about dieting.
Me: No, it's too depressing right now. I've hit a plateau and am losing motivation and just no.
Self: Talk about the cats.
Me: They are really cute. But, I don't have any new photos of them, and the cats require pictures. Their cuteness must be shown at all times.
Self: I know. Ikea.
Me: I did that yesterday.
Self: But, you're still thinking about the computer desk and how to rearrange your room so it's more adult like.
Me: I know. But, I'm also thinking it might be easier to just move and start over from scratch.
Self: But, I don't really want to move.
Me: I know. I want a vacation.
Self: I can't talk about that because it involves talking about work.
Me: This is a boring entry.
Self: No it's not. oh, I know. The shred box. Throw something in the shred box. It'll make me feel better.
Me: Oh that did feel good.
Self: I'm going to throw something in the shred box, too.
Me: Isn't that great?
Self: Love the shred box.

The Swedes plan to become the next superpower with the L-wrench

Did you know Saudi Arabia has an Ikea? It's true. I saw it on their website. Ikea is taking over everything. Through their mass produced furniture that is further homogenizing the world the Swedes are exporting their culture and next thing you know we'll all be taller. That's right world, watch out for the Swedes. They're taking over one pre-fabricated couch, coffee table, media cabinet living room set at a time. But, hey at least the threat is coming from Sweden and not the US for a change.

So, this Saturday after having some sushi (I'd be worried about the Japanese trying to take over the world. But, that's so 1980's) I decided to take a look at Ikea and what my future masters have in store for us. Going into Ikea can be a little scary because I'm always a bit afraid I'll never find my way out. The design those thigns to be so labryntine I start having visions of being lost in Ikea forever until I die. And then I'm still stuck as a lonely ghost trying to follow the arrows out. But, somehow always ending back at the kitchen butcher block islands. (That's part of the big plan, too. Because it's so much easier to take over the world when it's population is trapped in a store.)

But, then I start walking through and instead I'm overtaking with excitement. Shelves and bookcases and computer desks and wardrobes. I imaginie how I could rearrange my room so it's not such a cluttered mess. Everything neatly stacked and stored. Plus the fun of assembling it. Because, y'all I actually enjoy assembling furniture.

That's right, I don't buy cheap book shelves from Target and Ikea because I have little money and a post-collegiat attitude toward furnishing. Nope, it's the some assembly required that pulls me in.

So, now I'm browing http://www.ikea.com as I imagine how I can make my room all grown up and organized. Then reality hits. I'd clutter everything up anyway. What can I say. I'm a rat pack and clutter bug. I clean up nicely but I'm entropy in action. Eventually it all moves to chaos.

Still, I want that that computer armoir. Then my wall space would open up. And I'd have more space for my mess. Next week you might be hearing horror stories of how I fought the L-wrench and the L-wrench won. But, then I'll scarf down a hot dog while watching baseball with a cold beer in my hand so I don't lose my American roots. Okay, wine. It'll be wine because I don't like beer. Are the French trying to take over the world one wine bottle at a time?

Cheers,
v.carrie